I am so bad when I am sick...

Morning!

I AM SOOOOO BAD - first off i am at break typing this, so this might be pretty short.

Yesterday i felt SO sick and i kept vomiting, it has been going on for 2 weeks, but the vomit part was like a week, but it came to the point i couldnt bend without feeling bad, i still kinda do, but i am feeling much more energized. i went to the dr yesterday, took two pregnancy tests (i know a few ppl who are bummed that i am not), it was negative, so i had xrays, and blood work, and i have some blockage in my stomach, so i have meds i am taking, but it is making me pee like CRAZY, and my stomach hurts SOOO bad... so much pressure and pain... -.-

so i pretty much spent all day in bed after i came home from the doctors, bad sleepless night *ugh*

anyways - i gotten this SPECIAL Coach shopping online invitation, members only (you can sign up for one) since i gotten like, *thinks* 6 things from thier store in a year so yea, i gotten myself a smaller purse that goes across the chest if i wanted, *yay* it was 70% freaking percent OFF! So i ordered it online - i called through the VP last night and made SURE i can trust them because i am not in the mood to get another fake - but i did my investigation.

I know i know i was gonna not use the purse stuff - i tried for a few days, but i felt like i was being judged, i do keep my purse in the trunk most of the time. but when i am driving the Calibar, i am forced to bring it with me (hatch back) i do keep alot of crap in my purse.


i am not changing wallets, makeup wrist purse or coin purses

If i get rid of any of them - i would be selling them. i do rotate purses so, i just switched to my black one and cleaned my other one, which looks ALOT cleaner now.

Break is pretty  much almost up.


Have a good day - i have 5 mins time to read the other followers! 

Starting again

Morning

It is 445 AM right now – I gotten up at 4 am to make his lunch (I will make mine shortly – apple, grapes, pasta) and did a work out – not a long one today was the first work out I did in 2 weeks, I still feel like crap.

Something is wrong – I need to go to the dr soon, (I KNOW I am NOT preg just your FYI) I am getting sick in the stomach, Saturday night chris brought home a hamburger, and I puked, I gotten sick TWICE and I smelt that AWFUL smell of pickles it was just SO strong – something is interfering with my allergies cuz now its getting WROST – I need to see the specialist there is an appointment that needs to be made.

Yesterday – we gotten a KICK BUTT DEAL! For five chairs – for our deck, it was 500 something and we bought these comfy chairs for 129 bucks! *oh yeah* now we have to get a table, then our deck will be complete.

I was gonna make a girl’s game night but like I said with the hottub, kinda have to wait till this remodel is done, I know I am excited about this closet/craft room.

So chris can have his game room back. Last night I did some pampering I know I needed – I did stain feet/hands, now my feet feels good (mary kay), I took a nice shower, gotten new loofah, I did a good lotion all over that NEEDED to be done. I gave myself a pedi, and I painted my nails, the thing about the job I am working in now – not only it’s the office job my nails aren’t crappy all the time like it was at target, always breaking. Yay – that reminds me I need to take prenatial vitimins after this blog – oh my coffee!! I haven’t been to starbucks as much as I want to – but that’s okay – I get it does get expensive but once every week or two is good – today is one of them when I meet with someone tonight.

Btw I got my GOLD CARD FROM STARBUCKS *Finally* it looks really good with my name and when I  became a member

Time for breakfast – my menu: light yogart and apple. btw - i lost a inch of my waist - yay

New ideas....

Morning,

Someone gotten my MOJO back when she was here at my house on Friday when the boys took out the hot tub  - I did some beadings I couldn’t believe how much I did and how LONG it took.

I don’t want them for myself, there are some pretty cute things, I wanna support my hobby – but it isn’t cheap – I decided to take a bunch of other’s suggestions, sell… just to support it… if it goes well, MAYBE I will consider a business for it. I know it has happened before by others.

I am actually considering if I have so many within a month – maybe offer to SOMEONE to host a party (like a candle party/mary kay and etc) but I will have to figure out the hostess present.  I don’t want them to be UNafforable – once I get this going – I might consider to make REAL good stuff with JADE and etc – but maybe on ESTY they talk about? (but I doubt it) The one thing is the money i get will ONLY go to the beads. I shouldnt have to worry about paying anything else with them.

I got caught up in laundry yesterday *yay* I hate doing that chore – yesterday was a calm day for me – I didn’t have to deal with anything but me. I know I needed that – today the closet will be worked on (aka craft room) gonna be a while before I think about hosting anything at my house till it is done remodeling. I have big plans for that room – I will put in a small card table, a chair, my stuff chris will have a bigger closet when they pull the wall down from the guest room closet and the game room closet and make it bigger for him.

Today’s words:

Blessed above women shall Jael, the wife of Heber the Kenite, be…. Asked for water, and she gave him milk… she put her hand to the tent pin, and her right hand to the workmen’s hammer. And with the wooden hammer she smote Sisera, she smote his head – Judges 5:24-26

I am sure soon I will be writing about a certain verse I have a bunch of good ones I want to share!

Have a good weekend.

Now I know why I feel this way

Trust in, lean on, rely on, and have confidence in Him at all times you people; pour out your hearts before Him. God is a refuge for us (a fortress and a high tower). Selah – Psalm 62:8

Good morning – it has been a while since I opened the book of “The Confident Woman Devotional” book my friend has given to me for my birthday – it started to help me when I was feeling depressed, like I am right now.

I feel lonely than I normally do – I just realized something when my sister sent me a email about her blogs – I realized – “Where is God in all of this?” and I have forgetting to write/pray to him, I have not been reading the Bible – Bible study has been put on hold until September. No wonder why I have been feeling moody, sad, hurt all this week. It pretty much started up again when we were heading home from our trip. That day was just a disaster, so many things kept hitting me so fast in a short amount of time, it was like so many different things. It almost made no sense, I went home having a breakdown, I cried till I thought I couldn’t cry anymore. I didn’t speak to anyone all this week, except yesterday I started to talk to someone. Just general talk.

Today I will need to do a lot of laundry due to the fact we had to bug bomb the house while we were gone, catching up on a lot of wash – my house is much cleaner, it needs to stay that way (the cat food, ants found the cat food, just in the spot -.-) that didn’t help the stress either.

Someone else made me realize – all these things I do – I am just pushing people away. Why? I wish I knew. All this week I had this “I don’t know what is wrong with me” and now I know why. I get more depressed when I don’t have Him around me, I know hes there, but what am I doing? I am not talking to Him, I am not praying or writing to Him. I know I am shutting Him out – I don’t want that – I will take the time to write to him today after my husband leaves to work, then I will write to him, start reading that book the daily book – I need to feel better about myself, I need to love myself, not hide myself. I know I am not easy liked – but it doesn’t matter I am lucky to have what I have. a lot of people don’t even have that.

I started to read Harry Potter book 4 last week – lemme tell you – it is NOT easy to get into it, I am BORED out of my mind…. But no I need to force myself and see what is all the fuss this is all about. Since my social life is pretty much a dud right now, seeing a friend once a month or even less I need to do more things on my hands, I know I am busy already – yesterday a bunch of boys came over to remove that hot tub (FINALLY after a freaking year) there is gonna be some remodeling in this house – gonna have two walk in closet one for me and one for Chris – mine will be the “craft room” well kinda, but my stuff will be in that room, and they are gonna remove the wall from the first bedroom and the guest bedroom closet and make it bigger for him and his games, and then put in another bathroom in the bigger bedroom/laundry room *just stink, toilet and mirror* so then we will have two and I’ll be happy – I hate having ONE bathroom. We plan on buying THIS house once we can afford it. I lived here as a child, and I am back in it, I have so many plans for this house. Now if I can get us to downsize a lot – have fewer stuff esp the ones we don’t use.

Another goal – I want to start updating my blogger more often. I think people should have updates about me – although which is sad the email I use for this account I don’t check often. (thedreamer1985 – if you need my new updated email address lemme know – I made a new one for professional reasons/less spam)

Have a great day.

Amber

An update of my life

Morning!

WOW it has been so long since I updated – shame on me – I LOVE blogging – sadly I actually havent had time to do like… anything.

I am not reading as much as I want except for the book club books – and I have been working on ONE book for the past two months -.-

I know I am spending a lot less time on FACEBOOK – but that’s a good thing – still trying to cut down.

Lets see what I can update:

1. I have started a new job (and I love it – not so horrible like Target or discrimating) but I still keep in touch with those from target that I still try to interact with the good ones. And I passed my 90 days – I am getting AWSOME benfits - that includes paid vaction times too. :-D
2. we got ourselves a new car – my kia was really dying on me, it decided to go backwards instead of forward, once at a light when I was trying to go forward (in front of a cop as well) it went reverse, and it has happened on other occasions I had to trick my transmission to get it in gear. We gotten ourselves a new dodge advenger express midgrade 2011 car and I am LOVING it. I know I cried when I gotten rid of my KIA – it was really heart breaking for me, I had it for so long, my first car that I BOUGHT, and so many memories.
3. my social life has been a dud – I have been hanging out with a few people but I have been so busy with work and life itself I haven’t had much time for anything. But I am grateful I will be seeing Miss. Sarah today – I haven’t seen her since birthday time.
4. I have been working out much more – I was brave enough to post up comparrassion on my weight loss – no one notices (or says anything but that’s okay) about the differences IRL – but I think with the pictures a lot can notice the differences. My weight has been a struggle for so long – sadly today I did not do a work out – I am just so burnt out this week – I have been making sure I am not eating the bad food.
5. I have given up junk food for 6 months – three down 3 more to go – I am actually considering to give it up even longer.
6. I miss my old style – the way I used to be, the way I used to wear my clothes, my hair, not caring about what people think of me – I was a tom boy – what happened? I was forced by society to be a girlie girl – but on weekends – I am carefree I wear what I please – I put on my baseball cap a couple of weeks ago for the first time in years, and I LOVED it.
7. Bible study got started back in May – I was so grateful – the people who are in the group I haven’t seen or heard from in years – which is great because now I can re build a friendship with them! J
8. Buffy is now 17 months old – she has been so good – she is a very good puppy, most of the time she is in control but there are a few occasions when she is extremely excited – but we keep in mind shes “8” years old in human years.
9. our cats – we gotten a doggy door from my parents since they gotten an upgrade – and they have been using it, so basically I haven’t cleaned the cat box in months –because they live outside, they love it outside. They are both microchiped (all of them are)
10. Dakota joins me and Buffy for walks when we go, she is an indeed a strange cat.
11. I picked up crocheting – but I haven’t touched the yarn or my God Sister’s Christmas present in a few weeks -.- I need to get it done before Christmas.
12. I have not beaded for a few months either.
13. we met a couple well – I met a couple and chris works with the husband during his Christmas party – we have been double dating  and I love it. we had our very first couple get away.
14. this weekend is our 2^nd wedding anniversary and we are going to silverwood – I never been there, or heard of it. I am pretty excited – and we are going with the family: Elizabeth, Ryan, Zach, Allie – it will be a lot of fun.
15. we will go to ocean shores in September, I am pretty excited, it has been too long – with the truck up and running, we will be bringing it for the boys to use (the boat).
16. last weekend I did some volunteer work – caring for kids – it still amazes me how people can be so ungrateful – this year was worst than last year – explaining to all these people “the limit is ONE per family – this is all we have we have a lot of people behind you” it really sickens me when people are that selfish, people worked hard getting the free stuff to give away – or paid a lot of money for donations. But I still felt really good at the end because those who really did needed it – gotten helped.

I think that pretty much sums it up – today I have a customer service classes to attend to. I am pretty excited about that – and it will build my job position/customer service stronger.

Have a great week!

God Bless

Amber