take control.....

Good Morning my friends,

It has been a lil while since I have updated. I would like to count my blessing this morning. I don’t know if people realize how lucky each one of them are. If they don’t, they just don’t want to see it. everyone will have their bad luck moments, but the more one thinks negative, the more one allow the badness to happen to them.

I try to keep positive, and try to think good, I make sure I ask Jesus to save me when the Devil tries to control my thoughts to negative. I do not judge like I used to, I do not think badly about others or myself like I used to. No need, the more I think badly the more I am going towards the darkness… God calls me, and tries to pull me back into the light. I am not saying I would go to Hell, but I would miss out on a lot of the stuff God has to offer instead of the Devil.

I have not heard from the Job yet, I will call them today, if I do not get this job, I will be extremely bummed because this is the job I really want, but I know I will have more confidence to do some job searching else where. I know I will find a job that accepts me for me, appreciates me and my hard working and a positive environment. I still hope I get this job, but it is all up to God, I am letting him take hands, but I know if my prayers aren’t answered, this job isn’t for me.

Some people may still think negative towards me, acts negative towards me, hanging on to the negative side…. I pray for those, everyone should be happy with everything they have, even if they cannot stand the person/thing they deal with. Stress is one of the bad things people have to deal with their everyday life, but we shouldn’t take upon pity. God would want us to move forward, and love our life, if there is something we cannot love, fix it – that’s what I am doing. I love my life, I love everything except one thing, I have to leave and open another door God has to offer me. You know what they say “When one door closes another opens that’s what God has to offer you” these thoughts in my head wanting to test God but I make sure I say “I do not test him” then the more thoughts, again I say “Jesus save me” even if it is a few times, but I know the Devil still feels he can control my thoughts and action. I will not let myself fall again. He is mad that I am back on the right path.

I guess my faith has shaken when it turns out that my favorite priest that I actually wanted him to marry me and my future husband, gotten attacked, one sick person thinks they could get money from the Catholics saying he molested him, and we know it isn’t true, he resigned and went through the investigation he was proven innocent, he left because he didn’t want us to go through the bad things they are creating. Which is very considerate of him, but it was one of the most heartbroken, hardest thing I had to deal with. I cried so hard, I kept the magazine article, I couldn’t believe some sick person out there would attack the innocent. Because of the Devil controlling that horrible soulless man to hurt a innocent man. I know I need to let that go, but that was the hardest moment of my life, my path gotten crooked the Devil took an advantage of that and pulled me away. It will not happen again. God has worked so hard to pull me back, after years of not going to Church, was a big mistake, I should have never turned my back to my church. The things I was involved with, I cannot take it back but I know God forgives me, it has been blocked out of my memories I don’t even remember them anymore, I don’t want to remember the bad.

Catholic jokes – are NOT funny, they are extremely hurtful towards me and my relgion. I would appreciate if one doesn’t say anything mean towards the Catholic, or bad jokes. They are the trigger (Including Micheal Jackson – I believe in my heart he was innocent) if one says something bad, I will confront “I think that is not funny, and I am Catholic that is a insult towards me” if they ask me why I will tell them because that is how I feel, and I would appreciate if one doesn’t do it again around me. People I see I should expect them to know how to treat one or another – including the knowledge of how to talk to each other. If they are Black – do you tell a racist joke to the black person if your white? No you don’t – its pretty much like that. This may sound snotty but its pretty much common sense. I do not know any Catholic jokes because no one says anything, and I appreciate that no one did.

I am gonna get around, I am already on my second cup of coffee – today is St. Patricks day – it is my grandfather’s birthday and my cat’s 6^th birthday.

Have a blessed day

God Bless,

Ambr